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A Poem by Shel Silverstein Well, my daddy left home when I was three, and he didn't leave much to Ma and me, just this old guitar and a bottle of booze. Now I don't blame him because he run and hid, but the meanest thing that he ever did was before he left he went and named me Sue.
Some gal would giggle and I'd get red and some guy would laugh and I'd bust his head, I tell you, life ain't easy for a boy named Sue. But it was Gatlinburg in mid July and I had just hit town and my throat was dry. At an old saloon in a street of mud and at a table dealing stud sat the dirty, mangy dog that named me Sue. Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad from a worn-out picture that my mother had and I knew the scar on his cheek and his evil eye. He was big and bent and gray and old and I looked at him and my blood ran cold, and I said, "My name is Sue. Now you're gonna die." Yeah, that's what I told him. Well, I hit him right between the eyes and he went down but to my surprise he came up with a knife and cut off a piece of my ear. And we crashed through the wall and into the street kicking and a-gouging in the mud and the blood and the beer. And it's that name that helped to make you strong." Yeah, he said, "Now you have just fought one helluva fight, and I know you hate me and you've got the right to kill me now and I wouldn't blame you if you do. I tell you I've fought tougher men but I really can't remember when. I heard him laughin' and then I heard him cussin', he went for his gun and I pulled mine first. And he said, "Son, this world is rough and if a man's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough and I knew I wouldn't be there to help you along. But you ought to thank me before I die for the gravel in your guts and the spit in your eye because I'm the nut that named you Sue." Yeah, what could I do? I got all choked up and I threw down my gun, called him pa and he called me a son, and I came away with a different point of view and I think about him now and then. Louis team we have Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third-- Costello: That's what I want to find out. Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third-- Costello: You know the fellows' names? Every time I tried, every time I win and if I ever have a son I think I am gonna name him Bill or George - anything but Sue. I want you to tell me the names of the fellows on the St.
Abbott: Strange as it may seem, they give ball players nowadays very peculiar names. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Costello: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money? Costello: Well, all I'm trying to find out is what's the guy's name on first base? Costello: I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT! Abbott: Wouldn't this be a fine team w i t h o u t a pitcher? Abbott: Now, that's he first thing you've said right. Costello: I throw the ball to first base, whoever it is grabs the ball, so the guy runs to second. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Costello: Now, when the guy at bat bunts the ball--me being a good catcher--I want to throw the guy out at first base, so I pick up the ball and throw it to who? I don't know throws it back to tomorrow--a triple play. Costello: Another guy gets up and it's a long ball to center.