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02-Feb-2016 19:03 by 8 Comments

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No matter what her age, there’s at least a 50% chance she will flake. The worst flake is when she simply doesn’t show up with no notice at all. If you have a casual work environment, think seriously about changing beforehand. As you’re meeting in a public place, arriving early is not a problem because it gives you time to observe other people in a social environment, that’s a learning opportunity. If your date is obviously not going well – for whatever reason – that phone call will save you without an awkward way out. As you’re a smart online dater (link below), your profile contained honest and realistic photos. Going for the kiss is a bold and confident maneuver. You’re giving the impression that such kissing is perfectly normal to you… I’m going to bow out of the seduction potential at the end of the date. It’s also your decision to do the same and pursue your other options. When a woman states that you’re not the one, you’re done. If you don’t like it, you’re not ready for Dating 2.0.A good flake will involve a counter offer via voice or text. Tell her you’ll call her another time (you won’t) or ignore the text. Arriving just a few minutes late is also an option because it signals to her that you have a full and busy life. “Oh crap, I have an emergency I have to deal with, I am so sorry.” It’s a nice excuse and protects feelings. Your date, however, may have very well posted much older photos or even photoshopped photos. If you’ve bounced to a new venue, a second date is almost guaranteed. In fact, at our age, it’s rather unseemly and pushy. To secure it, take her firmly in your arms and go for the kiss. That’s not my style (as my first dates will attest) because I’m over a certain age. But remember that while women are the gatekeepers to sexuality, men are the gatekeepers to commitment.

Thankfully, you’ve arranged for the bail-out call in advance. Egregious online dating profile lies should not be encouraged. In your conversation, avoid the heavy topics like religion, politics, and past relationships. Warning: I will be dishing up some inside information.As you’ve got other options, you can move on to the next one. Here’s a great rule of thumb – if you feel compelled to talk about your exes, you are not ready for dating. If she starts bad-mouthing her exes, that’s a huge red-flag. If you find yourself truly attracted to this woman, it’s time to ramp up your Charisma. Good Frame: Statements, Not Questions Online Dating, A Short Primer [If you liked this blog post, click the Donate button (top, right of this page) or support me through Patreon.When coaching post divorce, one of the first things I do is introduce clients to the different types of people they will run into.It is vital to understand that some people have baggage. In the past people dated from work or social settings.[Note: My target demographic is for a cohort over a certain age. “Keep Friday evening open, I’ll take care of the rest.” That’s a confident line, right there. You’ve now just entered the group of the top 20% of men. So you perhaps picked a happy hour at a relatively upscale place. Of course you didn’t ask for a date, you stated it (link below).

] So, you got yourself a date with a woman from online dating.

Do you know how many men actually show such confidence? You obviously picked something simple like ice cream or maybe a trip to the bookstore. Happy hours are good because it’s relatively inexpensive and if the date goes really well you can segue to dinner, preferably at another pace because of reasons discussed below. Also, it’s a public space so your date should feel comfortable.

Coffee is out because it’s been done to death and doesn’t speak well to your creativity. If she is not comfortable with a place that serves booze, think about the book store. If you get a positive text in return, go for the second date and be bold about it.

Dinner is also out because it’s too much cash for a first date with someone you don’t really know. Of course you like the bookstore, you literate SOB. “Our second date will be [insert activity that you want].

A weeknight is good for first dates because a Saturday date is too laden with formality and expectations. That one can be dinner or something more involved…and not a movie! Take this in stride because it happens often enough.

A first date is merely a chance to see if there is enough mutual attraction for a potential second date. If you do, your membership card to Club Charisma is instantly revoked. If it’s a weekday date after work, you should dress reasonably well. Standing out with good clothes is a serious hallmark of a confident man. Once the kiss is done, hit that second venue and don’t speak of the kiss again until the end of the date. Dates are about the time spent together, not the activity you might be doing. Despite the kiss ( or even the seduction), despite your perceived attraction from her, it’s her decision to bail on the second date.

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